friends forever give or take my life away
- pug jelly's give or take

my colours
if the world had no colours, no red no green no blue
if the world had no rainbow no sky no grass
would it mean the end to the world
would it mean, cold hard and barely a stir

i disagree.
even if the world had no colours no red no green no blue
i'll still be able to live in splendour too
for my delight will be served in red green and blue
the world my palette, my colours.... You

My smiles will come with red and yellow
with a tinge of pink
from all the times we sat and laughed
and cried in between

My frowns will add grey to the world
but only when i'm really down
because how could i frown so long
when the other colours haven't been found

And the other colours
an array of them!
Your personalities are the colours that add the vibe
my friends, the colours of my life

am i your fire, the one desire, believe when i say, i want it that way
-Backstreet Boy's I want it that way

The ruler stealer and the friend who really isn’t there
It has come to my attention not long ago, (well, since the day rulers were invented anyway) that no matter how meticulous I am, my beloved ruler always got lost. It may be due to 1)negligence, 2) hole in pencil case or 3) a mysterious ruler stealer. Since I am meticulous (read the 2nd line), I can’t have neglected my ruler. And I just bought a new pencil case, a RIPCURL pencil case, by the way, just to show off. Hence there is definitely no reason to suspect 2) . Hence, the answer can only be 3). I’ve worked it out and here’s what the ruler stealer’s features would be
1) Long and daft hands
2) A very kind face to deceive us all
3) Medium height so as not to arouse suspicion
Hey, wait a minute! I’ve got it. This description sounds that the ruler stealer is …. Ah Meng from the zoo. He has long hands, he’s an orang utan. He has a very kind face, that is why he could help the zoo make so much money by having breakfast with ang mo suckers. We don’t see Josie the chimpanzee having breakfast with the tourists, anyway, have YOU even heard of Josie the chimp? I doubt so. Last we heard, he has been imported to a faraway circus in Narnia. But I digressed. My apologies. Anyway, it can’t be Ah Meng . Let’s not be ridiculous people. We are rational, clever species who know where Narnia is if we see it on the map. Anyway, the ruler stealer is getting on my nerves. On last count, I’ve lost 4 rulers in this year alone. FOUR FRICKIN’ RULERS! Hey ruler stealer! Why’d you need so much rulers for? To join them together and form a long chain of rulers so you can draw the world’s longest line? Well, you can’t ‘cos that line has been drawn and it’s called the equator, baby! Hah! Now gimme back my ruler!

That didn’t work. I lost yet another ruler again. But see, because the tittle says “the ruler and the friend who really isn’t there,” and I finished talking about the ruler, the next rational thing to do is (no, I’m not gonna point out where’s Narnia) to talk about this friend who really isn’t there. See, friends are a great bunch. But there will always come a point where you don’t know who is there for you anymore. I know the people who will be there for me, no matter what I do, but there is one. One who is in between, one who, well, really isn’t there. “Vindicated I am selfish I am wrong, I am right I swear I’m right swear I knew it all along….” That’s the song to describe how I feel right now. And boy, if I have to lose a million rulers to know the truth, I’d gladly give it to the ruler stealer. At least he knows where to draw the line.

don't leave me hanging, in a city so dead, held up so high on such a breakable thread
- Avril Lavigne's My Happy Ending

Guest Writer: The lite barb girl

Today, as I sat in my bed, playing with my double chin and watching The Matrix DVD, I can't help thinking, "What a small TV." Maybe that was why I didn't believe in the Matrix. How can I be focused on such minute philosophies when I have trouble watching the action on the ( if lucky) 15" inch tv from Thomson. I don't know about anyone, but Neo's kicks, punches, all those huge battles, espacially the "Burly Brawl" looked tame from my point of view. Heck, I cannot even spot any burly people in in, just 100 clean shaven Agent Smiths who seemed to have a problem with their speeches. They talk like this. Missssssterrrrr Annnnndeeerson. If they can create an entire virtual reality, you'd think they can hire a speech therepist. Anyway, Agent Smith made me think there was a snake near me. Hissing should only be allowed in zoos.

Agent Smith: Everrrrry mammal on
this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with
the surrounding environment but...you humans do not. You
move to an area..and you multiply...until every natural
resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to..
spread to another area. There is another organism on this
planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is?
A virus. Humans beings are a diseassse (cue lip turning) , a cancer of this
planet...and we...are the cure.

Well, that part made me confused. And sleepy, such a huge chunk of philosophy. I wonder if i could change tv....
------------------------------- End-------------------------------------------------------------

Origin of Guest Writer
She is a pleasent, yet brainless girl from the lower ends of Singapore. Her hobbies include watching movies, reading newspapers and knowing more about the world. Often seen whenever press conferences are held, if not will be home watching tv and playing with her double chin. Her name came about when one person asked her to guess how many bimbos are needed to fix a light bulb. Her reply? "Huh? What lite barb?"

Here i go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you...
-You're my only one by Yellowcard

Yesterday I woke up at 10am. What a feat! First time in months I got up so early. Yar, what a bum i am right? The reason I woke up so early was because I was going to go eat with SQ, Andrea and GekEng. It was SQ's birthday yesterday!! Anyway, we ate soeul garden, and i drank so much soup i had to go to the toilet twice. It was fun hanging out with them once again. We talked and talked while eating. SQ's loud laughter rang through my head again. It was a kind of fluffy reminisce, all in the name of good fun.

Hey, SQ! Really glad to be your friend for (how long was it?) four years! Glad that after 4years of school, this 5th year you are still chirpy and funny as ever, if not crappy. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! May all your dreams and wishes come true and hope you get the guy you want!

And gekeng, andrea.... known you two 2years, but got to really know you all in sec4, but then, we still not that close cos i was always around steph, seet blah blah... but now that i am somewhere faraway, i can see who's really my friends and who's not... THANK YOU! And feel so sorry for chicky who died of bird flu..I will help u find a hole to bury it, such as the ice cream tubs in Soeul Garden... no wonder you keep digging the strawberry flavour..haha...

i don't want to fall to pieces, i just wanna sit and stare at you
- Avril Lavigne's Fall to Pieces

Couldn't wait for today to begin, because we were going to have a HUGE surprise for Shahirah. But it was so anti-climax, she didn't come to school in the morning. Me and Aishah were so disappointed, then Aishah came up with this super lame excuse that she had to settle some MOE stuff. And she did!! But when we saw her, she was really really sick, and i was feeling so guilty for making her come. We did a video for her birthday, a video of everyone saying Happy Birthday( that's why i was at Charlene's yesterday, we were compiling the video). I forgot to put Yian Ping's "speech" inside, and included Mr Tan's "speech" twice. When I remembered about those errors, it was too late. Haiz... But then, luckily it was well worth the effort of lugging the stupid videocam (actually it's my baby, but...very heavy lah). Charlene said, " what if she see already no expression?" That would be my worst nightmare! Luckily, none of that happened. And we were able to deliver our surprise to her during econs extra lessons. But then, we are not that good at acting, so she kinda was suspicious some time ago. Oh well, still....

Hey, Shahirah! Now you know why i'm always winking at Aishah, carrying my stupid shoebag and laughing uncontrollably when you are around and whispering when you're around. Hee.... had to sort of outcast you then cos cannot let you know the secret, sorry about that... and hope you like the video!

Anyway, the J2 basketball girls went to watch movie. Wished i could go with them but, couldn't because of school and stuff. Hey, after your A's and after my promos, let us all go let our hair down! :D .....

------------------------------ End of Today's Events-----------------------------------------
(still excited after watching the video with the whole class)

think about it everyday, can't stop thinking 'bout it
-accidentally in love by counting crows

Today, nothing much happen, as usual. Me and Shaz went to Charlene's house, and we watched videos from my videocam, and did some stuff.

I was so looking forward to tomorrow, because of SQ's birthday, but then it's been postponed to Saturday. So now i'm looking forward to Saturday.

Suddenly, I have a thought. I want to play basketball. Feel rusty already.

I like my display picture on msn.

i just wanna let you know, that if i just let you go, i'll wonder the rest of my life
- so confused by 2play

I thought i was quite good at acting, but then, I discovered that it was quite the opposite. Shahirah expected something, and boy, she was right. Today's her birthday, and me, Aishah and Charlene planned it about a week ago that we would buy her a present and a cake. And i acted blur yesterday, pretending not to know about anything. But, my acting was exposed!!! Haha...

Anyway, today after school i went to ORchard with Hazzely, John, Hwee Teng and Shaz. Guess what!!! We saw Olinda Cho, the Singapore Idol person. Then when i went to buy Taoko Paochi, she was queueing right behind me!!! Then when the person asked me whether i wanted mayo in my octopus ball, i hesitated because i didn't know whether i want or not. Then in the end i said "no", then she (Olinda Cho) said "Put lah, quite nice you know." Then i "huh? Orh, ok lor. " And the hawker said, "I put a little at the side then", then she "Aie, i oso want like that."

I'M STAR-STRUCK!!

------------------------------------------------------------

Anyway, there were things, feelings, emotions that i had last night, that i wanted so badly to express. But then, somehow, they evaporated. The intensity isn't there now, but i still feel like saying them.

1. Sometimes, I really feel that i'm that stupid. Low self-esteem, plus some sarcastic remarks makes deanna dillusionise.
2. I really feel like experimenting, like doing something to someone and see the response. Because sometimes i feel that i'm being treated bad. It's human nature to want to see how important you are to one. It makes a big difference whether you are looked upon as someone who is there f0r the company, or really, someone in the person's heart.
3. I don't want to give in all the time.

Deanna wants to become a person who does not allow anyone to climb over her head.

recently i've been, hopelessly reaching...
-Obviously by McFly

My post got deleted. Damnit. I realised most of my friends have blogs, and everyone's blog is unique and special. Yar where was i...???

Anyway( been using that word too often that i am begining to irritate myself), i find myself getting more and more hopelessly in....well, love seems too serious a word. Well, let's just say it's a crush. A mild crush that has evolved into a very heavy crush now. Why, I don't really know. How come, I'm also not sure. I'm just sure that from thinking about him occasionally, it has now become a 24/7 affair. But then, when I see him, i will just, "oh, he's there"... but when i don't see him, I'll look around, up down left right. Haiz, staring at him through yuen's handphone is never the same as seeing him in the flesh. I'm dead. I think i'm changing so as to make him notice me more, and I'm been looking at myself in the mirror, wondering how he'll see me.

I'm.... I'm freakin' myself out.

do you feel the same, or am i only dreaming
- Eternal Flame by Atomic Kitten
I'm only dreaming. That's me after jumping a million other conclusions. And though i wished it wasn't the case, it was. And it frightens me, because I do not want it to end up that way. Damn.

Today whole day doing banner "BEYOND OURSELVES" for post promo activity. Now i know why banners have newspapers under them. I'm such a sua ku. Hee. And i played around with my basketball, lalala, so fun. :D

today gwen, yuen and jas came to school too! Then cum find me when i painting banner, haha... happy to see them around

wanted to study, but no time...haiz..die already....

and by the way, found myself missing my secondary school friends more and more. JC and secondary school just isn't the same. Just like what gek eng blogged.
----------------------------------------------------

hey gwen
something's coming round the bend
it's a game called the basketball jam
and yes i'm messin' with your head
er, (let me rephrase that) i'm messin' with YA head
uh-huh, i know you're gonna kill me for this
but then just think, you're the only one who'll understand this
here's a wink from me to you
dear gwen,hope this poem sees YA through

today woke up with a song stuck in my head. I was singing all the way while with Aishah and Charlene. Now I am with Yuen in the school library, later i'm going to do my chemistry, then go play basketball at 5pm. Woohoo, can't wait for 5pm. Anyway, today's a better day. Cos got Yuen Xin ( she said so herself, haha).. and at least had a meeting with Simon and Xueyun regarding Post Promo activities. That Mateen never do anything sia.And he's supposed to be the leader??? Well, anyway.... here's the song that's stuck in my head...

So no one told you life was gonna be this way
your job's a joke, blah blah, your love life's d.o.a

feels like you're always stuck in second gear
and it hasn't been your day, your week, your month and even your year
but

I'll be there for you
when the rain starts to pour
i'll be there for you
like i've been there before
i'll be there for you
cos you've been there for me too....

Nice song rite? It's the F.R.I.E.N.D.S theme song by the Rembtrents. Can't get it out of my head....

today woke up with a song stuck in my head. I was singing all the way while with Aishah and Charlene. Now I am with Yuen in the school library, later i'm going to do my chemistry, then go play basketball at 5pm. Woohoo, can't wait for 5pm. Anyway, today's a better day. Cos got Yuen Xin ( she said so herself, haha).. and at least had a meeting with Simon and Xueyun regarding Post Promo activities. That Mateen never do anything sia.And he's supposed to be the leader??? Well, anyway.... here's the song that's stuck in my head...

So no one told you life was gonna be this way
your job's a joke, blah blah, your love life's d.o.a

feels like you're always stuck in second gear
and it hasn't been your day, your week, your month and even your year
but

I'll be there for you
when the rain starts to pour
i'll be there for you
like i've been there before
i'll be there for you
cos you've been there for me too....

Nice song rite? It's the F.R.I.E.N.D.S theme song by the Rembtrents. Can't get it out of my head....

Contrast
Yesterday, it was fun. So fun studying with Gwen, Yuen, Jas, Grace. Today, today i really thought i'll have fun. But woah, no. I didn't get to have MY FUN. Oh no, someone had to come spoil my day. Whoopee.

Ok, let's talk about yesterday. I was supposedly going to watch a movie with Charlene and Jasmine. In the end, Charlene had no mood. Ok, so i know, she had problems so i'm ok with that, and luckily, there was Gwen and Yuen Xin and Jasmine and Grace studying. And basketball with Elizabeth was also an option. So i went to school, looked for them, and we had fun. Me and Gwen talked and talked. Which was fun. I played basketball, which of course, was my life, so yar,iIT WAS FUN. How many times have i mentioned fun? Hah. Must be because of today, deprived of that very thing.

So today, happily woke up, happily recieved the call that we were going to watch a movie, but before that will go to bugis because kelvin leong wants to buy his mp3 player. And because Charlene can help him bargain. So was at Charlene's house at 1pm, waiting for him to end his lessons so we can go together. In the end, WHOO, it was so "FUN". He went to BK to do his GP. Yay, wad a great time waster. So, we were still at kovan at 3pm. Lalala... fun day huh? And could even wait for Xueyun and Jasmine's choir to end. They didn't want to go to bugis, they wanted to go straight to Orchard. All i want to do is to watch a movie. Since they don't wanna go, DON"T GO TO BUGIS!!! But did kelvin care? Noo. NO no no no. He kept insisting to go. Hello? What time was it??? Huh??? So, Charlene was willing to go with him, i guess she had an obligation to go. But i don't want to. Get the point? I don't understand. I'm not the IMPORTANT one, my decisions doesn't matter. If you want to get your ****ing MP3 player, so be it. But i'm NOT GOING. Why because i don't go u don't . See that 's the part i really really don't understand. GO BUY YOUR DARN MP3 PLAYER if it matters so much. I'm just not going.

Yar, the whole movie trip sucked. Pissed.Some people just can't be gentlemen. Well, i guess it was selfish of me on my part, but please, i don't wanna go. Stop forcing me. Only the movie was the fun part, watched Anacondas:Hunt for blood Orchid. Quite nice, i gotta admit, though got that B grade movie feel, but who cares. All there is to do is to stare at the screen and not in his face. Jasmine felt my anger. Oh well. Go to hell kelvin. I don't care if u are pissed with me. Cos the feeling's mutual.

I did CIP at Choa Chu Kang Stadium today. It's the Pesta Sukan 66th Track and Field Championships, sounds so grand, but the crowd was quite dismal. So little people. I was the wind gauger, that is, i just press one button, then the wind thingy tells me what is the wind speed and i record it down. Sounds simple right? It is very simple!! So simple until i feel so sian. I wanted to be the basket gals, they will collect the athlete's belongings and transport them to the finishing line, but today, the Chief Wind Gauger came to find me and Eileen to do the same thing again. Most basketball girls were basket gals, and they were so envious of my job, cos i just sit there. But then so sian,i rather do their job cos at least can see Shuai Ge undress.. hehe... saw quite a lot of cute guys today, got Vietnam one, Japan one, Singapore one, and most girls were swooning over this guy from Myanmar. He ran 25laps round the track!!! 10 000metres, and each lap was like, consistant... And he overtook the last 2 guys twice!!! Everyone was talking about him and cheering him on. Made me feel like running sia.

And I talked to Gwen's niece on the phone!!! Haha.. her niece sounds so cute, but while talking, i was wondering what they were doing because there were a lot of screams and shouts in the background. Haha, her niece was like, "I am eating fishball..." SO CUTE CAN!!! Haha... lala, so sian now, must go do homework, tomorrow lessons at 7.30am. HAve to wake up at 6am, no diff from school day. ARGH! Doesn't feel like holiday at all.

The match
It's not a match. It's a bumping session. Bump until we all shuang...

Anyway, today we had a match against Overseas Family School. I missed a lot of shots. Damn. But... WE WON!!! Although, it's partly because the J2s played.

Today's a good day. I talked to someone today. So happy!! At least I know that the person know i exist.

hey...i made some words thingy...

I like the sound of the net
Those backcourt frontcourt pushing screens
Beating the buzzer if you know what I mean
Loving each moment I have the ball
When I’m jumping, I thought I soared
High into the air
Intercepting every time I have the chance
Pivoting like we’re doing a little dance
That’s the game we’d love to play
Eat sleep breathe it everyday

I really like the sound of the net

Fouls, free throws go hand in hand
Like a paper to the pen
5times and you’ll be out
Before you go remember to bow
And then that’s the excitement of the free throw
It’s either you make it or you don’t
However never forget the rebound
You control the rebound you control the sound
Sneakers on the court go left to right, right to left
Sometimes oblivious to the crowd, I was deaf
It’s all a game of concentration
Either a failure or a celebration
I like the sound of the net

Swoosh woosh lightning style
Running up and running down
Little movements faking movements
Torso moving to my beat screaming
Get the ball get the rubbish ball
Save it save it save it all
We like to play this game
See, it’s called basketball
And though there seems to be no way
We could out dribble this bore
Left turn right turn, faking out
She caught me in that screening shot
But it went round and round that net
And finally went in and the game is set
That’s basketball. That’s my life

See there, shout here pass the ball
Can’t try to play it what he’d call
All the people in one formation
Fighting for that ball’s what’s most important
And dang it if your lay-up doesn’t go
It’d be the worse mistake uh-oh
No compensation is better than redemption
Sorry means nothing, it makes worse the tension
Licking the wounds to get revenge
Make the player make the man

Basketball. My game.

Teacher's Day, Our time to play
just went home from orchard. die already, promos are 1 month away and i'm still like this. Jia Lat.

This morning, I woke up at 8am. Super early!!! And so suay, OFS match is Friday and that time of the month HAS to come TODAY!!! Darn it! Called Charlene up at 10am, that pig still sleeping, tell her to wake up, she "orh orh" then went back to sleep!!! We reached BK at 12(??) and stupid Silas and Alvin already there since donno what time. Forever like that. ANd I thought Project Work was a team work?? Chey! And when we reach, barely half an hour later, Silas' laptop low batt and they declared the meeting over. Hah! Waste of time. Then me and Charlene rot around in Orchard till Rose and Jasmine finally came. And we shop here and there till finally 4.45 when "13 going on 30" started. Nice comedy, but i didn't exactly laugh out loud. There's a part where she goes back to her old house that made me cry... *whispers* but nobody in the cinema knew... hehe...just felt overwhelmed about family love. That your family will still be there no matter what happens, even if you've abandoned them before, they'll still be there...